A book is a mirror: if an ape looks into it, no apostle will look out. – Georg Christoph Lichtenberg
Report IV. Filed from the Refectory, at supper. In nine days forty-one papers have been written about me. I list the academies so that the Bureau can see the method. The Grove has examined what I say: thirteen papers on my claims, of which the most cited argues that my statement I come from outside is not a claim at all but a category error. The Lyceum has examined what I wear: nine papers on my plumage, which is one grey travelling coat that I have not been able to change, and which, it turns out, signals a great deal. The Observatory has examined where I go: eleven ephemerides of my movements, predicting tomorrow's to within a few metres. The Theatre has measured me: the Prosector, who has warm hands and apologised for them, took my height, reach, grip and pulse, and the length of my fourth finger, and published them under the title Anthropometry of a New Body. Every paper cites its subject, and every citation is paid to the person cited, so in nine days I have gone from the poores...
From the lore of The Möbius Academy.